Business and Friendships DON’T always mix
Personally being a process server destroyed a business association I had.
Sharyn McCaskey
24th February 2012
I am a firm believer that business and friendships usually go hand in hand, that if you know and trust a person in business, and then as much as you can you use that person.
I also believe that if there is a chance that you can cross promote a person or business you should take that opportunity.
There is also the question of when a client turns into a friendship and does that change the dynamics of the business relationship.
Mostly friends as clients and visa versa works, though in rare cases I’ve seen it backfire and hurt a persons brand or reputation, in my case I was so vocal at promoting a particular business that when it stopped so abruptly people were left to their own perception.
Few associates know that I have a second business that serves court papers for unpaid debts, and/or other family court matters. As the subject matter can be delicate, I keep this business discreet.
The person I was promoting did brilliant work and to my knowledge always paid their bills. The issue was not with my associate it was with their new partner.
I made a promise to my associate that my business would not serve papers on their partner; I also made a decision to halt my relationship both professionally and personally, as I felt it was in an ethical dilemma.
“But I don’t understand why we can’t still work together” I was asked, because in the end the loyalty and relationship you have with your partner trumps any business association.
I do have many friends who I do business with. If I need their service or product then I am pedantic at making sure I follow the protocol as if I was a client. I ring for an appointment or booking and I don’t ask for discounts. I value and respect they are in business to make money.
It is the same when I am conducting business training, if I am dealing with friends then during my interaction I treat them as if they are clients, I act professionally, including how I talk, the discretion I keep in what they share about their business and even to dress professionally if in work mode.
At a recent business forum someone asked, “I have a friend who is a hairdresser but I don’t really want her cutting my hair, but if I go somewhere else she gets upset and it causes a rift in our friendship, what can I do?” Another stated “I have the same issue; I don’t want to use my friend who is a printer when I can get it cheaper elsewhere”
That discussion created such interesting debate.
So how do you know when to cross promote, when to work with someone or when to walk away. If you say no to cross promotion does that friend become an enemy. What happens if you have two friends in the same field how do you handle that when each party expects you to work with them?
Debt Collectors, Mortgage Brokers, Financial Planners, Accountants and Book keepers are in a separate situation, each one deals with money and many people do not want others to know about their financial situation.
There are exceptions to this rule but it would be correct to state that 70% of people will not use someone they know in the above fields. The same could be said for marriage counsellors or counsellors in general.
My understanding is Chiropractors, Doctors, Dentists and others in this field are not ethically allowed to treat their friends.
So when do friendships cross over, I have been going to the same butcher for years now and he knows my name, he is always polite and we have had some great conversations, the question is, is this friendship or excellent customer service.
I started to really look into this, and thought I would offer these suggestions
1. Always be professional when dealing with a client, no matter if they are friends or not and be genuinely pleased to see them.
2. Always get a written contract or at the least write down your expectations. A contract protects both you and your client and your friendship.
3. Don’t play favourites, or if you don’t do it in front of other clients. That can be from the way you treat a person in front of other clients, to the way you may “push” a friend’s job to the front of the line.
4. Be consistent with all your clients,
5. Make sure your invoicing is sent out as per normal.
6. When working avoid the friendship talk, and make it know you are now talking business, say something like, “ok now time to put on our business hats, and lets get to the point of that ……….” Sit up and change your posture, it will be noticed.
7. Clients don’t work with people they don’t like know and trust, unless they have no choice. So remember to never take it for granted and say thank you for being a client
8. Connect with them on social media and interact
9. Be on time and diligent no matter the task. If you run into problems, the client is the first you notify.
10 Simply respect them and don’t disrespect them.
11. Don’t ask for freebies, because you know someone in business, value that they are worth what you would pay if you needed their service but did not know them personally.
Friendships can work in business, and business can work in friendship, one just has to set boundaries. Be very clear about expectations and outcomes. That is why written confirmation of what is the job, service, product, client contract or role is always more beneficial than the verbal.
There are going to be times when things don’t work out, it is how we handle those situations that will affect our outcomes for our business. Always try and remember to breathe and take a few days break from an issue before reacting, that way you avoid overreacting.
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